Thank you so much for taking an interest in my social life. I really expect that it comes from the nicest possible place.
But if you ask a question, be prepared for the answer - The honest and sincere answer.
I don't date so I can be the change I want to see in the world.
Yeah, you read that right. So I can be the change I wish to see in the world. No I'm not trying to be all mystical about it. I've distilled it down for you. Why don't you follow me through this little sojourn down my train of thought...
So how can not dating really "be the change" you want to see in the world? Well it's a few steps but they all come together quite nicely.
I am the father of a 5 year old daughter. After 2 marriages and 47 years around this pretty blue globe, I think that one of my most important things in my life is my daughter. I am the sun and the moon and the stars to my little girl and I want to do nothing more in life than to snuggle up with my little girl on her bed, have her put her arm around me, tell me sweetly "I love you daddy", and fall asleep. There is very little in life that really lives up to that feeling. I've had some really nice high points in my life; and some really bad lows, and nothing really compares to that "moment of clarity" that I had in my little girls arms.
There are quite a few belief systems that indicate that the innocence of a child, a puppy or anything small and still "innocent" are as close to true happiness, God, nirvana or "Buddha-nature" as you'd like to ever see. Many people also indicate from their own experience how much they missed the "innocence of youth" and my experience is very similar. Now that I can see what the "innocence of youth" really is, I can truly appreciate it for what it was.
You see there is nothing more pure, more sincere, more genuine than the love of a child/innocent. Down at it's CORE it's one of the purest emotions I've ever felt and regularly shows me how live in thisSure, you don't have them every day, but if you can find one and hold onto it for a while, you really understand what TRUE LOVE is.
That's it. The most powerful thing in the world is true love. Don't think sappy-sweet, or princess bride. Think analytical "oh I see how he got there". For many people throughout the earth their families are everything to them. Everything. Many people go through hell and high water for their families. Some don't but those that don't, I'm sure, can see the value of it most times.
Why are things like that?
What's that have to do with my social life?
So when I have the opportunity to go out, I need to weigh that against the impact that I have on my little girl.
I want to be an example for my little girl. I want her to grow up seeing that daddy is happy and content just by himself without needing to be in (or seeking out) a relationship. I want her to grow up independent and strong and to not NEED a person in her life. In order to do that I need to spend the time now demonstrating with my ACTIONS how to be an independent and strong individual. Maybe that can be done in a relationship, but until one presents itself that meets ALL my needs it's just not relevant. I have a 5 year old girl who wraps her arms around me, tells me that she loves me and falls asleep on me. And I've got a DUTY... a RESPONSIBILITY to make the world a better place. And right now that is all about snuggling up with my 5 year old and experiencing her true love and giving back to her this shabby, dirty, dusty remnant of love that I still have left.